The embers glowed softly, and in their dim light,
I gazed round the room and I cherished the sight.
My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,
My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.
Outside the snow fell, a blanket of white,
Transforming the yard to a winter delight.
The sparkling lights in the tree I believe,
Completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.
My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep,
Secure and surrounded by love I would sleep.
In perfect contentment, or so it would seem,
So I slumbered, perhaps I started to dream.
The sound wasn't loud, and it wasn't too near,
But I opened my eyes when it tickled my ear.
Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know, Then the
sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.
My soul gave a tremble, I struggled to hear,
And I crept to the door just to see who was near.
Standing out in the cold and the dark of the night,
A lone figure stood, his face weary and tight.
A soldier, I puzzled, some twenty years old,
Perhaps a Marine, huddled here in the cold.
Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,
Standing watch over me, and my wife and my child.
'What are you doing?' I asked without fear,
'Come in this moment, it's freezing out here!
Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve,
You should be at home on a cold Christmas Eve!'
For barely a moment I saw his eyes shift,
Away from the cold and the snow blown in drifts.
To the window that danced with a warm fire's light
Then he sighed and he said 'Its really all right,
I'm out here by choice. I'm here every night.'
'It's my duty to stand at the front of the line,
That separates you from the darkest of times.
No one had to ask or beg or implore me,
I'm proud to stand here like my fathers before me.
My Gramps died at 'Pearl on a day in December,'
Then he sighed, 'That's a Christmas 'Gram always remembers.'
My dad stood his watch in the jungles of 'Nam',
And now it is my turn and so, here I am.
I've not seen my own son in more than a while,
But my wife sends me pictures, he's sure got her smile.
Then he bent and he carefully pulled from his bag,
The red, white, and blue... an American flag.
I can live through the cold and the being alone,
Away from my family, my house and my home.
I can stand at my post through the rain and the sleet,
I can sleep in a foxhole with little to eat.
I can carry the weight of killing another,
Or lay down my life with my sister and brother..
Who stand at the front against any and all,
To ensure for all time that this flag will not fall.'
' So go back inside,' he said, 'harbor no fright,
Your family is waiting and I'll be all right.'
'But isn't there something I can do, at the least,
'Give you money,' I asked, 'or prepare you a feast?
It seems all too little for all that you've done,
For being away from your wife and your son.'
Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
'Just tell us you love us, and never forget.
To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone,
To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
For when we come home, either standing or dead,
To know you remember we fought and we bled.
Is payment enough, and with that we will trust,
That we mattered to you as you mattered to us.'
Let's try in this small way to pay a tiny bit of what we owe. Make people
stop and think of our heroes, living and dead, who sacrificed themselves for us.
LCDR Jeff Giles, SC, USN
30th Naval Construction Regiment
OIC, Logistics Cell One
Al Taqqadum, Iraq
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
The Soldier is My Friend
The Soldier is My Friend
Dedicated to U. S. Soldiers and Veterans
I have a friend who may not know or ever call my name,
A friend who may not visit, but I thank them just the same.
My friend is called the soldier who's on duty day and night,
For me to pledge allegiance, they have fought and paid the price.
Where would we be today without the brave hearts who have served,
So we can wave "Old Glory"; so our voices can be heard.
And what would life be like today without the many soldiers,
Who walked into the jaws of death with guns upon their shoulders.
Life would not be as great today, with freedom in our halls,
And we'd live in oppression and great fear would grip us all.
So when you see a soldier you should thank your God above,
For here's someone who represents the greatest gift of love.
And when you pledge allegiance, you should see a uniform,
Of those who walked through battlefields and weathered many storms.
We cannot take for granted what is takes to pay the price,
And be a U. S. Soldier who has made a sacrifice.
And whether they are fighting on the ground or in the air,
Or sailing on the ocean, we can rest assured they're there.
Oh what a peace it is for me to hear the sound of jets,
Of flying Air Force pilots who have bravely passed the tests.
And what a happy feeling when a ship pulls into port,
With smiling Navy Sailors who were holding down the fort.
Then what a sense of pride I have to see in my hometown,
A soldier in the Army who is serving on the ground.
And then there are the soldiers who are training on a team,
They're proud and they're courageous, the United States Marines.
If you have fought a battle or have lived through several wars,
And freed a camp of prisoners, saved a life or fed the poor.
Or if you've volunteered to go to places I've not been,
I salute you, U. S. Soldier, National Guard and Veteran friend.
For you have made the difference in America today,
And when I see the stars and stripes, I see a soldiers face.
A fearless face of courage lined with dignity and truth,
A face with battle scars or an enlisted face of youth.
And whether you are young or old, still serving or retired,
I live my life in debt to you who's walked through many fires.
I sleep in peace at night because you will defend our borders,
To go where you are needed, you will follow any orders.
So thank you, may God bless you and this country you defend,
This land is what it is because the soldier is my friend.
BY: Norma W. Beaird
Dedicated to U. S. Soldiers and Veterans
I have a friend who may not know or ever call my name,
A friend who may not visit, but I thank them just the same.
My friend is called the soldier who's on duty day and night,
For me to pledge allegiance, they have fought and paid the price.
Where would we be today without the brave hearts who have served,
So we can wave "Old Glory"; so our voices can be heard.
And what would life be like today without the many soldiers,
Who walked into the jaws of death with guns upon their shoulders.
Life would not be as great today, with freedom in our halls,
And we'd live in oppression and great fear would grip us all.
So when you see a soldier you should thank your God above,
For here's someone who represents the greatest gift of love.
And when you pledge allegiance, you should see a uniform,
Of those who walked through battlefields and weathered many storms.
We cannot take for granted what is takes to pay the price,
And be a U. S. Soldier who has made a sacrifice.
And whether they are fighting on the ground or in the air,
Or sailing on the ocean, we can rest assured they're there.
Oh what a peace it is for me to hear the sound of jets,
Of flying Air Force pilots who have bravely passed the tests.
And what a happy feeling when a ship pulls into port,
With smiling Navy Sailors who were holding down the fort.
Then what a sense of pride I have to see in my hometown,
A soldier in the Army who is serving on the ground.
And then there are the soldiers who are training on a team,
They're proud and they're courageous, the United States Marines.
If you have fought a battle or have lived through several wars,
And freed a camp of prisoners, saved a life or fed the poor.
Or if you've volunteered to go to places I've not been,
I salute you, U. S. Soldier, National Guard and Veteran friend.
For you have made the difference in America today,
And when I see the stars and stripes, I see a soldiers face.
A fearless face of courage lined with dignity and truth,
A face with battle scars or an enlisted face of youth.
And whether you are young or old, still serving or retired,
I live my life in debt to you who's walked through many fires.
I sleep in peace at night because you will defend our borders,
To go where you are needed, you will follow any orders.
So thank you, may God bless you and this country you defend,
This land is what it is because the soldier is my friend.
BY: Norma W. Beaird
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
What's New
Well things have been the same about...Christmas is right around the block and everyone is packing up to go home for a few weeks. There will be a handfull of us that will be here...The ones that are to sick or no family or just can't afford it.
On the 24th, I should be finding out whats going on with my stomach and what the plan of action is...But I'm not to sure. They kind of told me a tiny bit, but not really. It's all very frustrating!
I'm still mourning the loss of my dear friend Muse...I Miss him dearly but I believe in my heart he was a born again Christian.
I do not know when I will be out of here, but as soon as I can get my RTD (return to duty) orders, I can reenlist for Belgium and be out of here by the mid summer.
Much love,
Cat
On the 24th, I should be finding out whats going on with my stomach and what the plan of action is...But I'm not to sure. They kind of told me a tiny bit, but not really. It's all very frustrating!
I'm still mourning the loss of my dear friend Muse...I Miss him dearly but I believe in my heart he was a born again Christian.
I do not know when I will be out of here, but as soon as I can get my RTD (return to duty) orders, I can reenlist for Belgium and be out of here by the mid summer.
Much love,
Cat
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
To my angels
Happy Thanksgiving everyone and thank you so much for the overwhelming amount of cards! It is very uplifting to my heart...Even more so since I will not get to spend Christmas with my family in Oregon.
I will tell a bit about my history! I was born into this world on October 1st, 1988. I am one girl of four boys and the second oldest. I grew up on a 200acre dairy farm, though we also had ducks, chickens, pigs, goats, dogs and cats( the goats were my babies :) ).
My brothers ages are (soon to be) 10, 13, 16 and 21.
Growing up, my mother home schooled all of us but we played sports. I ran cross country and wrestled with the high school team and my little brothers wrestle, and the 16 year old dances and plays baseball.
On July 30th, 2006 I left for basic training with the Army. Though I had signed up with the Army in March of 2006. I was 17 and made a bet with my dad that if I got my pilot's license before turning 18, he would sign the paperwork allowing me to join. Mom was none to pleased to find this out AFTER dad said it was okay.
It was not my first time away from home but it was the last time I would call home, MY home... I was ready for my new life to start and I went in with a strong will and knowing God would protect me. Basic training was a blast! To me it felt more like a (harder) summer camp then what a military training camp should be, but I wasn't going to voice that to the girls that were crying every night.
Basic training ended and I moved to AIT (Advanced Individual Training) to learn the skill I had signed up for in the Army. 25L- Cable installer/maintainer or Cable dawg I would soon find out they are called. Training was a cake walk and I became the honor graduate of my class, missing distinguished honor graduate by a .5% grade.
I got my orders to report to my new duty station before the year was up and would get to spend Christmas with my family one last time. On Jan 2nd, 2007 I reported to Fort Huachuca, AZ and soon things fell into place. Some of the guys I went through AIT with had also reported there and things were going smoothly. I made new friends and my NCO was an amazing guy.
But things started to take a change for the worse. I started getting sick...very sick. I would eat and could not keep it in my stomach...I felt weak, tired and sick to my stomach. I would go to sick call and they would run a few tests but would tell me "Oh there is nothing wrong with you" or "your to young to be sick, go back to work". Frustrated, I pressed on. Sometimes I would go 3 or 4 days without eating, because the pain and sick that came with eating wasn't worth it.
Test after test was ran, but everything came back normal, and the same thing was said to me by the doctors.
Finally word of a deployment came up and soon we got our orders for a 15 month deployment to Iraq. Our unit readied itself and on Dec 8th, 2007 we hugged our loved ones one last time then departed for the sea of desert and sand. We spent a cold Christmas with each other as company in Baghdad, Iraq and depressed hearts. Soon we were settling into a way of life for the next 15 months.
As for me, I kept getting sicker but was keeping it to myself as best I could. My NCO could see the weight loss and energy loss, and tried to help me as best he could. I had one Sargent ask me if I was making myself throw up by looking for attention ( they would see me eat, then 5Min's later go to the restroom )...My NCO flipped out on him. My NCO feels like a big brother sometimes!
Finally after 4 months of being down range, I'm so sick and weak, before going to bed for the morning ( I worked nights) I tell myself I should go to sick call and get some IV fluid. I had been throwing up and couldn't even keep water in my stomach and it's very bad to be dehydrated in Iraq. I get to sick call and the medics take one look at me and start me up on some saline and tell me they are going to take some blood to send to the lab. Two hours later and next thing I know they are telling me they are going to medivac me to another FOB because they think my gall bladder ruptured. My white blood cell count is through the roof, and so they juiced me up and strapped me to a litter and threw me in a blackhawk.
After getting to this FOB they hit me up with some more saline bags and take me to get an ultra-sound of my gall bladder. But as the tech is looking, he tells me my gall bladder is fine, so I ask why are you still looking. He then rushes out saying he needs another person to look at this. After about 15 or 20Min's of them looking, they tell me they want a CT done of my stomach and that I'll have to stay over night to talk to the head surgeon in the morning, but they can't tell me what they've found.
That morning I finally see the surgeon and the first thing he tells me, "hun I'm not going to sugar coat this for you" and went on to tell me they had found a 4cm tumor on the head of my pancreas. I was going to be medivaced to Walter Reed in Washington DC and have a very hard surgery to remove it. IF I was lucky and they had found this in time, hopefully chemo would save me and I could recover from this.
I took this in, listening carefully...I was so glad to finally have a reason for being sick, that I wasn't just making it up or looking for attention. So when he asked if I had any questions, I asked just one. "Sir, will I get to come back to Iraq and be with my unit?" He looked at me like I was a crazy person and said "Most people are crying and begging to be sent home and yet you ask if you can come back...Are you serious? No you won't be coming back, You'll be lucky to survive your surgery".
Haha! Some people need to laugh more, I think!
That night I was put on a blackhawk for balad and from balad I was on a C-130 to Germany and Germany to DC. I've been at Walter Reed since March 28th, 2008. OH...I was medivaced on Easter Sunday...A Sunday I won't forget and a story I'll be telling my grandchildren.
On May 20th, 2008 I had my cancer surgery. It lasted 9 1/2 hours long and they were able to remove all of the tumor. I did not need chemo but I still have a lot of problems with eating. The docs don't know if its because of the tumor or because of something else, but we are trying to figure it out. I'm still getting a lot of tests done on me and on quite a bit of meds. I hope we can figure out what is going on with my body, I really love food!
I miss working, and I miss my NCO...If it weren't for him, I would have more then likely died. But quitting is not an option, I've come this far and been through pain that was unspeakable.
Thank you for your kind words and beautiful cards! I have included a few pictures and again thank you for being my angels...Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving and a very Merry Christmas!
Respectfully,
SPC Neary, Cat
I will tell a bit about my history! I was born into this world on October 1st, 1988. I am one girl of four boys and the second oldest. I grew up on a 200acre dairy farm, though we also had ducks, chickens, pigs, goats, dogs and cats( the goats were my babies :) ).
My brothers ages are (soon to be) 10, 13, 16 and 21.
Growing up, my mother home schooled all of us but we played sports. I ran cross country and wrestled with the high school team and my little brothers wrestle, and the 16 year old dances and plays baseball.
On July 30th, 2006 I left for basic training with the Army. Though I had signed up with the Army in March of 2006. I was 17 and made a bet with my dad that if I got my pilot's license before turning 18, he would sign the paperwork allowing me to join. Mom was none to pleased to find this out AFTER dad said it was okay.
It was not my first time away from home but it was the last time I would call home, MY home... I was ready for my new life to start and I went in with a strong will and knowing God would protect me. Basic training was a blast! To me it felt more like a (harder) summer camp then what a military training camp should be, but I wasn't going to voice that to the girls that were crying every night.
Basic training ended and I moved to AIT (Advanced Individual Training) to learn the skill I had signed up for in the Army. 25L- Cable installer/maintainer or Cable dawg I would soon find out they are called. Training was a cake walk and I became the honor graduate of my class, missing distinguished honor graduate by a .5% grade.
I got my orders to report to my new duty station before the year was up and would get to spend Christmas with my family one last time. On Jan 2nd, 2007 I reported to Fort Huachuca, AZ and soon things fell into place. Some of the guys I went through AIT with had also reported there and things were going smoothly. I made new friends and my NCO was an amazing guy.
But things started to take a change for the worse. I started getting sick...very sick. I would eat and could not keep it in my stomach...I felt weak, tired and sick to my stomach. I would go to sick call and they would run a few tests but would tell me "Oh there is nothing wrong with you" or "your to young to be sick, go back to work". Frustrated, I pressed on. Sometimes I would go 3 or 4 days without eating, because the pain and sick that came with eating wasn't worth it.
Test after test was ran, but everything came back normal, and the same thing was said to me by the doctors.
Finally word of a deployment came up and soon we got our orders for a 15 month deployment to Iraq. Our unit readied itself and on Dec 8th, 2007 we hugged our loved ones one last time then departed for the sea of desert and sand. We spent a cold Christmas with each other as company in Baghdad, Iraq and depressed hearts. Soon we were settling into a way of life for the next 15 months.
As for me, I kept getting sicker but was keeping it to myself as best I could. My NCO could see the weight loss and energy loss, and tried to help me as best he could. I had one Sargent ask me if I was making myself throw up by looking for attention ( they would see me eat, then 5Min's later go to the restroom )...My NCO flipped out on him. My NCO feels like a big brother sometimes!
Finally after 4 months of being down range, I'm so sick and weak, before going to bed for the morning ( I worked nights) I tell myself I should go to sick call and get some IV fluid. I had been throwing up and couldn't even keep water in my stomach and it's very bad to be dehydrated in Iraq. I get to sick call and the medics take one look at me and start me up on some saline and tell me they are going to take some blood to send to the lab. Two hours later and next thing I know they are telling me they are going to medivac me to another FOB because they think my gall bladder ruptured. My white blood cell count is through the roof, and so they juiced me up and strapped me to a litter and threw me in a blackhawk.
After getting to this FOB they hit me up with some more saline bags and take me to get an ultra-sound of my gall bladder. But as the tech is looking, he tells me my gall bladder is fine, so I ask why are you still looking. He then rushes out saying he needs another person to look at this. After about 15 or 20Min's of them looking, they tell me they want a CT done of my stomach and that I'll have to stay over night to talk to the head surgeon in the morning, but they can't tell me what they've found.
That morning I finally see the surgeon and the first thing he tells me, "hun I'm not going to sugar coat this for you" and went on to tell me they had found a 4cm tumor on the head of my pancreas. I was going to be medivaced to Walter Reed in Washington DC and have a very hard surgery to remove it. IF I was lucky and they had found this in time, hopefully chemo would save me and I could recover from this.
I took this in, listening carefully...I was so glad to finally have a reason for being sick, that I wasn't just making it up or looking for attention. So when he asked if I had any questions, I asked just one. "Sir, will I get to come back to Iraq and be with my unit?" He looked at me like I was a crazy person and said "Most people are crying and begging to be sent home and yet you ask if you can come back...Are you serious? No you won't be coming back, You'll be lucky to survive your surgery".
Haha! Some people need to laugh more, I think!
That night I was put on a blackhawk for balad and from balad I was on a C-130 to Germany and Germany to DC. I've been at Walter Reed since March 28th, 2008. OH...I was medivaced on Easter Sunday...A Sunday I won't forget and a story I'll be telling my grandchildren.
On May 20th, 2008 I had my cancer surgery. It lasted 9 1/2 hours long and they were able to remove all of the tumor. I did not need chemo but I still have a lot of problems with eating. The docs don't know if its because of the tumor or because of something else, but we are trying to figure it out. I'm still getting a lot of tests done on me and on quite a bit of meds. I hope we can figure out what is going on with my body, I really love food!
I miss working, and I miss my NCO...If it weren't for him, I would have more then likely died. But quitting is not an option, I've come this far and been through pain that was unspeakable.
Thank you for your kind words and beautiful cards! I have included a few pictures and again thank you for being my angels...Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving and a very Merry Christmas!
Respectfully,
SPC Neary, Cat
Monday, November 17, 2008
To honor a fallen comrade
Only god knows why when its time to lose another person so dear to our hearts.
We all know we must die, but none of us know when it will be our turn to go on or if we will be spared against all odds.
But we use this time to come together, to remember our fallen friend and sustain each other, through our relationship as brothers and sisters in arms.
When I was medivaced to walter reed, I was sick, alone and scared. But not for long
I soon found out Muse was there for his surgery too,
and it really helped to finally get back to a place where I could face this with an old friend and comrade by my side.
I want to tell you about something real important Muse did for me, just by being himself and being my friend.
You see the docs told Muse that he would more then likely be in the hospital for two weeks if the operation was a success and that the risks were very high.
Yet just 5 days after his surgery, he and I were walking through DC visiting the war memorials.
Walking past the monuments, sometimes Muse would wobble on his feet and when I would ask "Are you okay?" he would just reply "I feel great!" and then laugh.
He always had a silly grin on his face and a smart al-ick joke to go with it.
We spoke of home and how quite fort huachuca was after B co deployed. He felt ashamed for not being able to go with us, but was just glad to finally be getting help.
He told me he had been scared he wouldn't wake up from his surgery, but he didn't want to show that to his parents.
Still he knew he needed this operation and pushed his fear to the side and moved forward with his mission. And there he was 5 days later, with me touring DC.
As the day went on he showered me with punches, hugs, jokes, pinches and big grins. He felt more like a big brother and a best friend, not just a soldier and co worker.
His strength and good spirits were inspiring to me and would help sustain me as I lay in agonizing pain in my hospital bed after my own surgery the following month.
I know a person who believes that sometimes we are called upon to be each others angels in this life. That there will be times, without knowing it or doing anything extraordinary we can be heros just by being ourselves, helping a friend, inspiring or lending them the strength to keep fighting, or showing them a way through difficulty when it doesnt look clear. We become an instrument of something bigger then ourselves.
On that day, he was mine.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Sunday, August 24, 2008
The end of August already!!
So I can't believe it's almost September! It seems like I just left Baghdad and was getting here to Walter Reed. But already I've been here most of 5 months and still counting.
I had such a good time on convel leave and was slightly sad to be back here at WRAMC, But I still have to get better and heal.
Tuesday I will be going into the hospital for a few days to get my tonsils removed, but it's an easy enough surgery and should be okay after a couple weeks. I just will be eating through a straw and limit my talking. wooo.....
I want to thank everyone for everything they did for me while on leave. I can not thank everyone enough for letting my crash with them at their houses...Rick, Mary, Lora! Thank you sooo much!
I had such a good time on convel leave and was slightly sad to be back here at WRAMC, But I still have to get better and heal.
Tuesday I will be going into the hospital for a few days to get my tonsils removed, but it's an easy enough surgery and should be okay after a couple weeks. I just will be eating through a straw and limit my talking. wooo.....
I want to thank everyone for everything they did for me while on leave. I can not thank everyone enough for letting my crash with them at their houses...Rick, Mary, Lora! Thank you sooo much!
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Convel Leave
Hey everyone, as most of you know I left on July 18th for medical leave from Walter Reed to help with my recovery from surgery. I'm still on con leave, but I have to fly back to Walter Reed on the 16th and then on the 21st I have my pre Op to have my tonsils out! YUCK!
Anyway, here are some pictures so far!
Monday, June 23, 2008
Bass fishing
So on Sunday I got to go Bass fishing at Lake Anne with a group of soldiers that were invited by a man named Pil Maisel.
There were two boats that two local men donated their time to boat us around the lake and point out the best fishing holes. I had SUCH a great time! We took a quick dip. The water was warm and clean, and it felt nice to feel the water on my stomach.
There were two boats that two local men donated their time to boat us around the lake and point out the best fishing holes. I had SUCH a great time! We took a quick dip. The water was warm and clean, and it felt nice to feel the water on my stomach.
I caught a 5lb. 23' Large mouth bass my second catch! The first one I caught was smaller but still a good size. My second catch was the biggest one of the day! :) I had a lot of fun...
Cat
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Con leave
Hey everyone! So my recovery is going well, but slow. My wound is FINALLY starting to scab over in the spot that pulled apart and my navel is doing better too. I have another doctor's appointment on the 23rd and I should be getting close to finishing my appointments.
I will be flying back to AZ after July 4Th, picking up my car from the Cordero's house and then taking my time driving up the West Coast up to Oregon.
A friend I made here might be coming with me. His name is Ryan and he grew up in NY state, and has never really seen the West Coast. So I invited him along with me.
Other then that...I've just been laying in bed and trying to recover. It's going to be a long road before I'm finally 100% again, but I'm patient (enough) and will get through this no problem.
Much love,
Cat
I will be flying back to AZ after July 4Th, picking up my car from the Cordero's house and then taking my time driving up the West Coast up to Oregon.
A friend I made here might be coming with me. His name is Ryan and he grew up in NY state, and has never really seen the West Coast. So I invited him along with me.
Other then that...I've just been laying in bed and trying to recover. It's going to be a long road before I'm finally 100% again, but I'm patient (enough) and will get through this no problem.
Much love,
Cat
Thursday, June 5, 2008
Out and about
So last friday the doc let me out of the hospital.
Just thought I'd let everyone know and that I should be going on con leave in about a month.
Things are okay, just having a lot of pain and dealing with my stubborn self...I HATE laying in bed!
Here are a few pictures!
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Alive
Well everyone, I have lived through the surgery and the first week...Though I am not out in the clear yet, I have made progress and things are looking up.
Spoke with the doctor this morning and the results should be back from the pathologist and what this tumor really is.
I'm still in a bit of pain and I get sick easy. They said I could try solid foods today, but I'm skeptical as to how well I can handle it. I've been getting sick and throwing up the last two days just by drinking a bit of juice and water, so I really want to take it easy and may just nibble some oatmeal or something soft.
The surgery went better then they though and the tumor came right out. They didn't have to do the whole Whipple operation, which is great. I have all my organs except the gall bladder and a bit of the pancreas. Lets pray the pathologist has good news now!
Well I need to go walk around and then try to rest.
Much love,
Cat
Spoke with the doctor this morning and the results should be back from the pathologist and what this tumor really is.
I'm still in a bit of pain and I get sick easy. They said I could try solid foods today, but I'm skeptical as to how well I can handle it. I've been getting sick and throwing up the last two days just by drinking a bit of juice and water, so I really want to take it easy and may just nibble some oatmeal or something soft.
The surgery went better then they though and the tumor came right out. They didn't have to do the whole Whipple operation, which is great. I have all my organs except the gall bladder and a bit of the pancreas. Lets pray the pathologist has good news now!
Well I need to go walk around and then try to rest.
Much love,
Cat
Monday, May 19, 2008
The Calm before the Storm
So tomorrow morning I will be reporting for surgery.
It's weird to think I'll be on an operating table in the morning, and I can honestly say things for me will never be the same again. Mostly for the better I am hoping but I am ready for the worst...Bring it on baby!
I look back at the last two months and I am floored by how quickly your life can change! I went from doing my job, and working a nice shift in Iraq to *BAM* on a bird to Germany and then to Walter Reed in less then a week.
All things happen for a reason! For all I know, had this not have happened, I would have been in my trailer when it took a rocket and had been hurt.
Whatever the outcome of this surgery...I know I am in God's hand and His will is going into play.
Love you all and I will post once I'm well enough again, You can contact my parents for updates till then.
It's weird to think I'll be on an operating table in the morning, and I can honestly say things for me will never be the same again. Mostly for the better I am hoping but I am ready for the worst...Bring it on baby!
I look back at the last two months and I am floored by how quickly your life can change! I went from doing my job, and working a nice shift in Iraq to *BAM* on a bird to Germany and then to Walter Reed in less then a week.
All things happen for a reason! For all I know, had this not have happened, I would have been in my trailer when it took a rocket and had been hurt.
Whatever the outcome of this surgery...I know I am in God's hand and His will is going into play.
Love you all and I will post once I'm well enough again, You can contact my parents for updates till then.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Surgery
So Monday I saw my surgeon and he told me he had to leave for China. Meaning my surgery is now being pushed back until the 20th of May.
Stinks that I have to wait again, but I know it's for the better.
A cool note: I will be the youngest patient to receive this surgery called "Whipple operation" and they are going to ask for my permission to possibly print this in text books. Also, they will be taking pictures of the operation and said I could have copies of them.
Stinks that I have to wait again, but I know it's for the better.
A cool note: I will be the youngest patient to receive this surgery called "Whipple operation" and they are going to ask for my permission to possibly print this in text books. Also, they will be taking pictures of the operation and said I could have copies of them.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
The surgery
I met with my surgeon on Monday and he explained to me what is going to happen during the operation.
They are going to cut me from navel to breast bone and then take my pancreas, stomach, small intestine, gall bladder and bile duct out of my gut. They will be removing parts from all of them, and then rewire them. Though my gall bladder isn't even going back in.
The recovery is anywhere from 3 to 6 months and 100% recovery is at the least, a year.
The surgery date is 07 May, and I will be checked in on the 6th for surgery prep.
Thank you again everyone for your cards and encouraging support.
I love you all,
Cat
They are going to cut me from navel to breast bone and then take my pancreas, stomach, small intestine, gall bladder and bile duct out of my gut. They will be removing parts from all of them, and then rewire them. Though my gall bladder isn't even going back in.
The recovery is anywhere from 3 to 6 months and 100% recovery is at the least, a year.
The surgery date is 07 May, and I will be checked in on the 6th for surgery prep.
Thank you again everyone for your cards and encouraging support.
I love you all,
Cat
Friday, April 18, 2008
What's Been Happening
So I did the endoscopy last Wednesday and heard that following Monday the results. The tumor is a pre cancerous growth, meaning it has cancerous cells and if left, it will just keep growing and could spread to more of my pancreas or body.
The 21st of April (next Monday) I will speak with my surgeons and go over what needs to be done. But till then, the only news I have is that above.
Not a whole lot going on here, just trying to relax and enjoy this time to myself. Here are a few pictures of the area and what not.
Thank you again everyone who has been a great support and encouragement to me!
Much love,
Cat
The 21st of April (next Monday) I will speak with my surgeons and go over what needs to be done. But till then, the only news I have is that above.
Not a whole lot going on here, just trying to relax and enjoy this time to myself. Here are a few pictures of the area and what not.
Thank you again everyone who has been a great support and encouragement to me!
Much love,
Cat
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Address
So I got a call this morning from my doctor saying he wants to do the endoscopy tomorrow! This is good news though and hopefully I get some answers this week!
Also, I got my mail box today and the address is:
Catherine Neary
Abrams Hall, Box 4159
6900 Georgia Ave NW
Washington, DC
20307
Also, I got my mail box today and the address is:
Catherine Neary
Abrams Hall, Box 4159
6900 Georgia Ave NW
Washington, DC
20307
Saturday, April 5, 2008
More tests
Hey everyone! Friday's visit went very well and the doctor is a pretty nice guy. Here is the game plan for next week.
I get another CT done on Monday and then on Thursday I will get my endoscopy done and they will get a biopsy of the mass to really figure out what it is.
The only bad thing about getting this biopsy is, they have to cut ( a very VERY small hole)through my stomach wall to get to the pancreas. But all in all, pretty safe and the doctor said I have no worries.
The doctor said I should have had my gall bladder removed a long time ago and that will more then likely be coming out. But he also thinks because of the large size of this mass, it is causing a lot of pressure against my other organs. Which in turn is why I'm having a lot of other symptoms, even if this mass is nothing more then a build up of the cells and is not pre cancerous.
That is the word for right now.
Much love,
Cat
Also, I have my cell phone turned back on so if you need to reach me, just shoot me an email or comment and I'll give you my number. (maybe :P )
I get another CT done on Monday and then on Thursday I will get my endoscopy done and they will get a biopsy of the mass to really figure out what it is.
The only bad thing about getting this biopsy is, they have to cut ( a very VERY small hole)through my stomach wall to get to the pancreas. But all in all, pretty safe and the doctor said I have no worries.
The doctor said I should have had my gall bladder removed a long time ago and that will more then likely be coming out. But he also thinks because of the large size of this mass, it is causing a lot of pressure against my other organs. Which in turn is why I'm having a lot of other symptoms, even if this mass is nothing more then a build up of the cells and is not pre cancerous.
That is the word for right now.
Much love,
Cat
Also, I have my cell phone turned back on so if you need to reach me, just shoot me an email or comment and I'll give you my number. (maybe :P )
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
To see a doctor
I get to see a doctor on Friday and if she comes back early, maybe Thursday even. Don't know who I am seeing but I hope to learn more soon!
The SSG in charge of me said I will probably be here a long time. 3-4 months, but I don't know. I just need to see a doctor and figure it out from there.
Thank you everyone for your wonderful support and encouraging words!
Love,
Cat
The SSG in charge of me said I will probably be here a long time. 3-4 months, but I don't know. I just need to see a doctor and figure it out from there.
Thank you everyone for your wonderful support and encouraging words!
Love,
Cat
Friday, March 28, 2008
Walter Reed Army Medical Center
So I have finally made it here after a long week at Landstuhl, Germany. It's pretty amazing to be able to read all the signs and hear English being spoken. It still is kind of shocking to go from desert, war zone and staying alert, to wearing civilian clothes and being able to understand everyone when they talk.
But anyway, tomorrow I will get checked up and get set up in the hospital. On Monday I should be able to see my doctor then and figure out what the heck is going on with my pancreas. Till then, I'm chilling out in my room and trying to get changed to another time zone.
Just thought I'd post a quick update and let everyone know I made it back to the US okay.
But anyway, tomorrow I will get checked up and get set up in the hospital. On Monday I should be able to see my doctor then and figure out what the heck is going on with my pancreas. Till then, I'm chilling out in my room and trying to get changed to another time zone.
Just thought I'd post a quick update and let everyone know I made it back to the US okay.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Could it really be....
So I had been having some stomach pains the last few weeks pretty bad. Off and on mostly, but it was pretty painful when it would happen. So much so I failed my first APFT after doing only 47 situps, because the pain was so bad. I have never failed an APFT. Let alone in situps!
I went to sick call friday morning, they asked a few questions then took some blood. They gave me some nice meds for the pain and I waited for the results to come back. Around 1500 (after laying on a bed since about 0930) they tell me the blood work came back and I needed to be MEDEVACed to 86th CASH hospital on the IZ.
I was strapped to a litter and away I was flown that evening. I got to the trauma center at the IZ and they did an ultra sound, then a CT. I talk to a doc that next morning and they tell me they found a 3.2cm "mass" on the head of my pancreas in one of the ducts, I have to be MEDEVACed to Landstuhl Germany for farther testing, and probably to Walter Reed from there.
I'm in Landstuhl as I write this...It was a pretty big shock to hear this. I spoke with a doctor this morning and he said they have nothing here to help me and that I must return to the states ASAP to really see if this is cancer or if its just a benign mass.
If it is pre cancerous or cancer, then the surgery will be a pretty big one...Very major, he said and a long recovery. But if it's benign, then I should be okay and might return to Iraq with my unit.
It's been a long weekend and I hope to have answers soon...But I'll see what happens, I guess.
This isn't something I'd expect to hear at 19 year old.
I am young and strong...I'll get through this.
I went to sick call friday morning, they asked a few questions then took some blood. They gave me some nice meds for the pain and I waited for the results to come back. Around 1500 (after laying on a bed since about 0930) they tell me the blood work came back and I needed to be MEDEVACed to 86th CASH hospital on the IZ.
I was strapped to a litter and away I was flown that evening. I got to the trauma center at the IZ and they did an ultra sound, then a CT. I talk to a doc that next morning and they tell me they found a 3.2cm "mass" on the head of my pancreas in one of the ducts, I have to be MEDEVACed to Landstuhl Germany for farther testing, and probably to Walter Reed from there.
I'm in Landstuhl as I write this...It was a pretty big shock to hear this. I spoke with a doctor this morning and he said they have nothing here to help me and that I must return to the states ASAP to really see if this is cancer or if its just a benign mass.
If it is pre cancerous or cancer, then the surgery will be a pretty big one...Very major, he said and a long recovery. But if it's benign, then I should be okay and might return to Iraq with my unit.
It's been a long weekend and I hope to have answers soon...But I'll see what happens, I guess.
This isn't something I'd expect to hear at 19 year old.
I am young and strong...I'll get through this.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
The small things in life
Isn't it amazing how many things we take for granted in life?
Even the simple things, such as walking to your cars in the morning or even sliding into a warm shower at night! A soft king sized bed....Each day I never know if I'll enjoy another day with the easy pleasures of civilian clothes, driving my car or going for a walk without my M-16 slung on my side.
I just think it's pretty amazing I'm even getting to experience this journey and see the middle east...to be a part of history! It's all a very humbling experience for me and I am grateful for all of it, the good and the bad.
Love,
Cat
Even the simple things, such as walking to your cars in the morning or even sliding into a warm shower at night! A soft king sized bed....Each day I never know if I'll enjoy another day with the easy pleasures of civilian clothes, driving my car or going for a walk without my M-16 slung on my side.
I just think it's pretty amazing I'm even getting to experience this journey and see the middle east...to be a part of history! It's all a very humbling experience for me and I am grateful for all of it, the good and the bad.
Love,
Cat
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
I knew you'd come for me
I was in church a few Sunday's ago and the Chaplain gave a very beautifully painted message about how Christ will always come back to us.
Two boys, having known each other since birth, grew up together as great friends. As they get older, one man decides he is going to join the Army. The two being best friends, the other young man knew he had to go with him. They left for the Army and served side by side, and became great soldiers.
After a time, war broke out and they were called to join the battle. Months passed and they fought, watching each others backs and keeping each others moral high.
One night, a fierce battle broke out and their post was over run by the enemy. The two men were separated, one fell after being wounded and his friend was pushed back, unable to reach him. Finally the remaining soldiers were able to dig in and hold their ground.
While in the trenches, the one young man heard his best friend calling out "Help me please someone!". Over joyed to hear that his friend was alive, he went to his LT and begged him "Sir, please let me crawl to my friend and pull him back to safety!" The LT refused, saying they had lost enough good men in this battle and the sacrifice would be a waste
Hours past, and still his friend called out "Help me please, someone!". Each time calling the voice grew weaker and weaker, all the while the young man pleading with his LT to let him bring him to safety.
Finally, the LT grew tired of the begging and allowed the young man to crawl into the dark and retrieve his friend.
Without a second thought, the young soldier slide out of the trench, into the darkness and was gone.
Time past and finally the brave soldier slide back into the trenches with his friend. A medic checked his friend and pronounced him dead. The LT grew furious, saying "I told you it was a waste to risk your life for what, your friend's dead body!?".
"But wait", said the soldier, "It was not in vain that I risked my life. For after crawling through the mud, blood and bodies, I found my friend. I got there just before he died and when I came up to him, his last words to me were "I knew you'd come for me" and died in my arms.
As the Chaplain read this story to our small group, you could see tears falling in many eyes. The Chaplain's message was this...
Even after we fall away from Christ, no matter what the situation, He is always calling for us. He will be there always, waiting for us no matter how long it takes for us to find our way through the dark. He is our best and only true friend, who we can depend on to be there for us.
Such a powerful story that describes God's love for us, in a way that hits home for us Soldiers.
Thought that this was something cool to share and I hope you enjoyed it.
Two boys, having known each other since birth, grew up together as great friends. As they get older, one man decides he is going to join the Army. The two being best friends, the other young man knew he had to go with him. They left for the Army and served side by side, and became great soldiers.
After a time, war broke out and they were called to join the battle. Months passed and they fought, watching each others backs and keeping each others moral high.
One night, a fierce battle broke out and their post was over run by the enemy. The two men were separated, one fell after being wounded and his friend was pushed back, unable to reach him. Finally the remaining soldiers were able to dig in and hold their ground.
While in the trenches, the one young man heard his best friend calling out "Help me please someone!". Over joyed to hear that his friend was alive, he went to his LT and begged him "Sir, please let me crawl to my friend and pull him back to safety!" The LT refused, saying they had lost enough good men in this battle and the sacrifice would be a waste
Hours past, and still his friend called out "Help me please, someone!". Each time calling the voice grew weaker and weaker, all the while the young man pleading with his LT to let him bring him to safety.
Finally, the LT grew tired of the begging and allowed the young man to crawl into the dark and retrieve his friend.
Without a second thought, the young soldier slide out of the trench, into the darkness and was gone.
Time past and finally the brave soldier slide back into the trenches with his friend. A medic checked his friend and pronounced him dead. The LT grew furious, saying "I told you it was a waste to risk your life for what, your friend's dead body!?".
"But wait", said the soldier, "It was not in vain that I risked my life. For after crawling through the mud, blood and bodies, I found my friend. I got there just before he died and when I came up to him, his last words to me were "I knew you'd come for me" and died in my arms.
As the Chaplain read this story to our small group, you could see tears falling in many eyes. The Chaplain's message was this...
Even after we fall away from Christ, no matter what the situation, He is always calling for us. He will be there always, waiting for us no matter how long it takes for us to find our way through the dark. He is our best and only true friend, who we can depend on to be there for us.
Such a powerful story that describes God's love for us, in a way that hits home for us Soldiers.
Thought that this was something cool to share and I hope you enjoyed it.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Happy Valentines Day!
Happy Valentines day everyone! Hope yours is filled with love and care!
Here are some pictures, nothing really going on though. It's starting to warm up, A LOT. Gosh, I'm not excited about summer coming. Yesterday it was at least 70 outside. Wow...And its hardly February!
Thank you everyone for your support and care!
Love,
Cat
A "reflective" moment with SGT Gunderson (yes, I ment to do that)
This is the outside of out "hoochs"...Each room has two beds and two wall lockers. And it's three rooms to a hooch.
A bombed out palace. This isn't our fault. It's been hit by their own people, with rockets and mortars. If we had hit it, nothing would be left. :)
How weird is this? Trips me out everytime I look at it!
Here I am just before breakfast.
Here are some pictures, nothing really going on though. It's starting to warm up, A LOT. Gosh, I'm not excited about summer coming. Yesterday it was at least 70 outside. Wow...And its hardly February!
Thank you everyone for your support and care!
Love,
Cat
A "reflective" moment with SGT Gunderson (yes, I ment to do that)
This is the outside of out "hoochs"...Each room has two beds and two wall lockers. And it's three rooms to a hooch.
A bombed out palace. This isn't our fault. It's been hit by their own people, with rockets and mortars. If we had hit it, nothing would be left. :)
How weird is this? Trips me out everytime I look at it!
Here I am just before breakfast.
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